My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
