hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize