In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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