She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
