check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
