Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
home. puking in laundry basket.
there was a trapeze. enough said
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Randomize
