i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
