worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize