I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
