Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
