Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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