Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
My brain says no but my pants say off.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
