She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
