I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Randomize
