your room smells of hookers.
And success
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
