Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
How's work?
Spinning.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
