she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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