So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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