is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
