the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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