What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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