You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Randomize
