You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
