don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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