i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
