I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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