Me too!
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
