i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
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