youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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