Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize
