Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
