You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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