He kissed a someone with a penis
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
