the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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