last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
