Cold hands, warm shart.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
