Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
