Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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