I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
