He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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