it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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