adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
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