So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Randomize
