so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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