About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
