there's paper in my vomit.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
