What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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