You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
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