I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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