Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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